How NOT to Write a Resume

You can learn a lot about how to do something right by first learning what NOT to do.

Take resumes, for example.

I review about 200-300 a month, and most have at least 2-3 mistakes. Yet, all those hundreds of mistakes can be grouped into just a handful of categories, which you would do well to avoid.

Read on and learn how to write a better resume by avoiding the mistakes of others, some of them unintentionally hilarious ...

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Mistake #1: "Golden Retriever Syndrome"

Never talk about yourself in terms that could also describe a hunting dog, like the following language, which appears in far too many resumes I see:

"Hard-working, self-motivated and dependable individual."

Tired phrases like that mean nothing to employers, because they could apply to almost anyone ... or almost anyone's dog.

Instead, dump the empty assertions and back up the claims in your resume with facts, like this:

"Proven sales skills. Ranked in top 3 among 78 reps for 5 straight years, exceeding sales quotas for 18 of 20 quarters."

See the difference?

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Mistake #2: A Verbal Jungle

To improve your resume (or anything you write), read it out loud. Since writing is just words on paper, reading it aloud will help you write as you would speak.

Here's an example of language so dense, you'll need a machete to find any meaning:

"Directed assembly of elements from business units in engineering, development, program management, distribution, and legal to effect market research, proposal responses, and contract management into comprehensive, virtual, successful teams ..."

After reading that three times, I'm still baffled.

Worse, do you think employers have time to read a resume three times to figure it out? No. As a result, that job seeker is still looking for work, I'll wager.

Solution: read your resume out loud before sending it out.

If you find yourself gasping for breath halfway through a sentence, stick a period or dash in there and break it in two.

And if anything you write sounds less than 100% clear when you read it aloud, revise until it would make sense to your mother. Doing so will ensure that your resume resonates with readers at all levels, from HR managers to your future boss.

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Thoughtful Thank-Yous

I get asked these questions over and over: "Should I send separate thank-you notes to everyone who interviewed me? Can I just send one thank-you note to the hiring manager and ask him/her to thank others involved in the process?" 

The answers are yes and no, respectively.

Send a separate thank-you note to everyone who interviewed you, whether it was an informal pre-interview phone call, an interview lunch meeting, or the final formal interview after a lengthy process.

Don't be stingy with your thank yous!

It's an easy thing to do, it will only take a few minutes--and it will make the recipients feel good about you! Why wouldn't you jump at the chance to do 

that?

You can make your thank-you notes relatively short. They can be sent via snail-mail or email.

(There are differing opinions on which is best. I prefer the now "special" touch of a real letter over the routine method of email; others think email is best because it's faster. Just remember that what you say is more important than how you send it.)

Make each thank-you note slightly different by mentioning something in particular that you and the recipient discussed. This is a good reason to do your thank-you notes right away, while the interview is fresh in your mind. You might even want to take notes for this purpose.

Here's a great tip that will really impress the hiring manager: add a P.S. that mentions how helpful someone was, by name. I'm not talking about people directly involved in the interviews; they should get their own thank-you notes. But if there was a receptionist, an administrative assistant, or someone else who was helpful during your interview process, say so. Those people are rarely recognized, but may have influence with the hiring manager. The boss will think of you as someone who appreciates his team, notices things most other people overlook, and goes the extra mile.

Why make this a P.S.? Studies show that most people read the P.S. before (or even instead of) reading the main body of a letter. This P.S. will get attention and impress the reader, which will get your entire letter read and your thoughtfulness remembered!

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